logo-image

Dividing a Loved One’s Ashes

August 1, 2023

BACK

Dividing a Loved One’s Ashes

Giving each family member a chance to say goodbye in a personal, meaningful way.

Sometimes people leave behind detailed instructions about how they’d like their bodies to be laid to rest. More commonly, though, those decisions fall to those left behind. The heightened emotions of grief can make it hard to decide on anything, much less something as important as how to say goodbye to a loved one’s remains. When multiple family members each have their own ideas and opinions about what’s appropriate, conflict and confusion can follow. to require someone doing the work of making sure they happen. And, more likely than not, that responsibility will land on someone you love.


This is one advantage to cremation. It solves the immediate concern – taking care of your loved one’s body – so you can take your time deciding what to do next. Once someone has been cremated, there is no rush to decide what to do with the ashes.


Another advantage to cremation is that you don’t have to choose a single resting place for the remains of your loved one. You can scatter most of the ashes while keeping a portion in a keepsake urn or pendant. You can scatter or bury ashes in multiple significant locations rather than choosing just one. Cremation ashes can also be divided among family members, allowing each person to choose what they want to do to honor their loved one’s memory.

How to divide cremated remains

After a loved one is cremated, you’ll receive their cremated remains in a temporary container unless you’ve already selected an urn. They will be kept sealed in a plastic bag inside the container or cremation urn. This makes transferring the ashes from one vessel to another quite simple as you can just remove the bag and place it in the new container. 


There are no laws limiting how ashes must be stored or divided. You are free to divide them among as many friends or family as necessary. However, dividing cremation remains can be an emotionally intense experience, and any accidents can be very upsetting. That’s why we recommend you bring your ashes back to the funeral home to divide them, or request for them to be divided as part of the cremation process, instead of attempting this yourself.

Considerations for families separated by distance 

If you are dividing ashes among family members, or arranging for them to be scattered in multiple locations, you may need to transport the ashes over some distance. 


Perhaps the simplest way to transport cremated remains is in a car. There are no laws limiting the transport of cremation ashes in your own vehicle. You will want to be sure the container is safely sealed and the container is placed somewhere that it’s unlikely to tip over or be damaged, especially if they’re already in a fragile urn. You can use a seatbelt to keep the urn in place, or place the urn with packing material inside a box on the floorboard for greater security. 


You can also travel by air with cremated remains in your carry-on luggage. You must transport them in a container that can be x-rayed, so avoid traveling with a metal urn. You will also need to provide a copy of the Certificate of Cremation from the funeral home. If traveling internationally, call ahead to ask if any additional considerations apply to your specific flight. 


Another option is to mail the cremains through the United States Postal Service. The USPS offers guidance on how to safely ship remains on its website. This is currently the only service for shipping human ashes. If you will be shipping remains, it’s a good idea to notify the recipient about when they’re expected to arrive and let them know what the package looks like, so they can emotionally prepare for opening them.

You don’t have to decide alone

There are no shortcuts through grief, and nothing can make losing a loved one easy. But the flexibility of cremation and divided ashes can help ease a difficult decision into something more bearable. It’s not a solution that works for every family, but it can provide powerful opportunities to create more personal goodbyes.


If you’ve recently lost a loved one and need help arranging their cremation, or if you have a loved one’s ashes and aren’t sure what to do with them, French Funerals & Cremations can help. Visit any of our Albuquerque funeral home locations or call 505-843-6333 with questions or to learn more about ways we can support you through this difficult time.

funeral homes Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations March 10, 2025
Discover compassionate funeral homes in Albuquerque, NM offering personalized tributes that honor your loved one’s legacy with heartfelt care and support.
cremation services Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations February 24, 2025
Explore compassionate cremation services in Albuquerque, NM. Honor your loved ones with a personalized and thoughtful ceremony at French Funerals & Cremations.
funeral homes Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations February 17, 2025
Discover essential tips on choosing the right funeral home for your family with our guide. Learn what to consider for funeral homes Albuquerque, NM.
cremation services Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations February 10, 2025
Discover how to plan cremation services Albuquerque, NM, that truly honor your loved one. Create a personal, meaningful farewell with our expert guidance.
funeral homes Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations February 3, 2025
Learn vital burial etiquette to honor loved ones gracefully. Explore tips for respectful attendance at funerals; seeking funeral homes in Albuquerque, NM matters.
cremation services Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations January 27, 2025
Discover key insights about cremation services and how to honor your loved ones with meaningful arrangements. Trust us for cremation services Albuquerque, NM.
funeral homes Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations January 20, 2025
Discover the benefits of discussing funeral pre-planning early with reputable funeral homes in Albuquerque, NM, for peace of mind and seamless arrangements.
cremation services Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations January 13, 2025
Explore the important considerations of direct cremation. Learn about the benefits and factors that families should know while seeking cremation services.
funeral homes Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations January 6, 2025
Discover how traditional burial services in funeral homes Albuquerque, NM honor life and legacy through personalization, reflection, and community. Learn more.
cremation services Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations December 30, 2024
Discover how to honor a loved one with personalized cremation services in Albuquerque, NM. Create a meaningful farewell that reflects their unique life.
funeral homes Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations December 23, 2024
Learn how to plan a meaningful funeral during difficult times. Discover support from trusted funeral homes in Albuquerque, NM when honoring your loved one.
cremation services Albuquerque, NM
By French Funerals & Cremations December 16, 2024
Explore how cremation services in Albuquerque, NM balance tradition and simplicity with cremation with viewing options for meaningful farewells. Learn more.
VIEW MORE
Share by: